Filed under: Dr. Bill Poore, Hottub blog, humor, leadership, observations, opinion
Reading Dr. Hottub’s new spoof of the reorganization, renaming, and revitalization of the of the SCBC, I have researched and identified from the federal government and our denominational structure how to reach retirement as a bureaucrat. FEMA must take credit for this magnificent strategy that has become a staple of all those who work behind the web of phone connections that lead ultimately to their voice mail. The National Incident Management System is the masterpiece system of bureaucracy that shines the way for us all. How does one succeed as a bureaucrat? Here are some key points to remember:
1: When things do not work or if they “fall below expectations” simply announce a reorganization. That will throw them off while you think of a way to get out of the mess.
2. Have a 1-800 help desk that leads you through a torturing line of questions until a person in India answers. They will become so angry they will hang up.
3. Announce a new management system that will cost ungodly amounts of money and then require all those who cooperate with you to comply with the system.
4. When it looks like people are catching on to your system then add a new level to it. That will keep them busy while you think of what else to do.
5. Hold money over their heads if they asked too many questions and say things like, “ if you want our help then you have to…”
6. When it looks as if everyone will comply with your bureaucratic maze of requirements then announce that system no longer works and we must reorganize, re-certify, revitalize, and rejuvenate the entire organization.
7. If by chance they find your office number amid the thousands of phone numbers listed in the phone book for your organization, have all phone calls taken by an assistant a few feet from your office door. Train the assistant to always say, ” Hold while I transfer you to his office.” When your assistant looks your way just point to the golf clubs lying in the corner and the caller will automatically be transferred to your voicemail. The voicemail message should say, ” I am sorry I am either on the phone or out of my office for the remainder of the season. If you need immediate assistance please hang up and call back and ask to speak to my assistant.” What they do not know is that your assistant has been trained to step out of the office immediately after taking the first call for at least 15 minutes. This effectively thwarts any further attempts to find answers.
If you keep this circus up for a while you will reach retirement age before they figure out that the position names have changed but the cubicles have been in the same place for 30 years.
Filed under: observations, opinion | Tags: chadwick Ivester\Sand Hill Baptist Church
It has been a wonderful blessing to be holding revival services at Sand Hill Baptist Church in Kershaw this week. My oldest son Seth traveled with me for 2 days and we had a wonderful time just being together. During the service tonight as I was struggling through 1 Thess. 5:11-17, I noticed Seth on the front pew trying the make a “taser” out of some object he had gotten out of a machine at a restaurant. I was interested in what he might have heard in the sermon so I asked him, “What did I preach about tonight?” He fittingly said, “How people who believe in Jesus should be nice to their preacher and each other.” I have never been so happy as a preacher than I was at that moment. Somehow I was able to break through the imagination of an active 8 year old and communicate all of the points of my sermon (I only had 2) to the degree that he could succinctly tell me the point of the passage. Like a child rejoicing over a mud castle, I rejoice that God has chosen to call me and bless my feeble attempts to preach his perfect Word. O how mysterious are God’s ways to bless the foolishness of the message preached to confound the wise.
Also, I pray that our faith and understanding of God’s call can be so uncluttered as the Seth’s was tonight. We fill our hearts and lives with meaningless walls and hindrances that cloud our understanding of the Lord and His Word. Let us have the simplicity to just understand and do what his Word says.
God Bless
Dwight
Will The AntiChrist Be Like Oprah??
1 John 1:7 ¶ Many deceivers have gone out into the world; they do not
confess the coming of Jesus Christ in the flesh. This is the deceiver and
the antichrist.
2 Thess 2:3 ¶ Let no one deceive you by any means; for that Day will not
come unless the falling away comes first, and the man of sin is revealed,
the son of perdition,
4 who opposes and exalts himself above all that is called God or that is
worshiped, so that he sits as God in the temple of God, showing himself that
he is God.
5 Do you not remember that when I was still with you I told you these
things?
6 And now you know what is restraining, that he may be revealed in his own
time.
7 For the mystery of lawlessness is already at work; only He who now
restrains will do so until He is taken out of the way.
8 And then the lawless one will be revealed, whom the Lord will consume
with the breath of His mouth and destroy with the brightness of His coming.
9 The coming of the lawless one is according to the working of Satan, with
all power, signs, and lying wonders,
10 and with all unrighteous deception among those who perish, because they
did not receive the love of the truth, that they might be saved.
11 And for this reason God will send them strong delusion, that they should
believe the lie,
12 that they all may be condemned who did not believe the truth but had
pleasure in unrighteousness.
I was recently asked by someone in an email, Is Barrack Obama the AntiChrist because he is a man in his 40’s that and he is a Muslim? I think it is clear from the email that someone has been taking their theology from the Left Behind books more than the Bible. However, I responded that the AntiChrist if he comes from the United States might look more like Oprah Winfrey in his theology than anything else. This video shows that Oprah Winfrey is leading a multitude of people down a self-enlightened path of destruction. The lie that they are being sold is nothing but new age spirituality that leads to humanistic self worship. This video clearly explains her theology in her own words.
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Ruth 2:12 May the LORD reward you for what you have done, and may you receive a full reward from the LORD God of Israel, under whose wings you have come for refuge.Ruth 3:8 At midnight, Boaz was startled, turned over, and there lying at his feet was a woman!9 So he asked, “Who are you?” “I am Ruth, your slave,” she replied. “Spread your cloak over me, for you are a family redeemer.” Matthew 1:5 Salmon fathered Boaz by Rahab, Boaz fathered Obed by Ruth, Obed fathered Jesse,6 and Jesse fathered King David. There are a couple questions that come to mind when I think of Ruth and Boaz. 1. Why does Boaz show this stranger so much grace?2. Why is Boaz so proactive to care for Ruth? Can one really say it was simply physical attraction? Obviously from his language, he believes he is too old for her. Calling her “daughter” and even mentioning another redeemer that was closer to her than he was. When one examines this marvelous story of grace and redemption with the rest of the biblical record a clearer picture comes into view. Boaz speaks of Ruth coming to the God of Israel for refuge. I imagine Boaz hearing this same phrase as a young child when his mother described how she was redeemed and how she found refuge under the wings of the Almighty when she trusted the Lord and hid the spies in Jericho. She described to him how the Lord had saved her from a life of prostitution and brought her into the household of Salmon who took her and gave her a new life. When Ruth wandered into the field of Boaz she did not know that God had placed her in the ideal field. Why? This man had a heart for the stranger because in the eyes of this foreign girl he saw his own mother. He boldly went to redeem her and take her as his wife because he had the courage and the heart of his father who was willing to show kindness and grace to a stranger. What this teaches me is that God uses our circumstances to providentially lead us to redemption and to His finest future for our lives. Who can fathom the riches of his grace and the depths of his wisdom?
Ruth 2:12 May the LORD reward you for what you have done, and may you receive a full reward from the LORD God of Israel, under whose wings you have come for refuge.Ruth 3:8 At midnight, Boaz was startled, turned over, and there lying at his feet was a woman!9 So he asked, “Who are you?” “I am Ruth, your slave,” she replied. “Spread your cloak over me, for you are a family redeemer.” Matthew 1:5 Salmon fathered Boaz by Rahab, Boaz fathered Obed by Ruth, Obed fathered Jesse,6 and Jesse fathered King David. There are a couple questions that come to mind when I think of Ruth and Boaz. 1. Why does Boaz show this stranger so much grace?2. Why is Boaz so proactive to care for Ruth? Can one really say it was simply physical attraction? Obviously from his language, he believes he is too old for her. Calling her “daughter” and even mentioning another redeemer that was closer to her than he was. When one examines this marvelous story of grace and redemption with the rest of the biblical record a clearer picture comes into view. Boaz speaks of Ruth coming to the God of Israel for refuge. I imagine Boaz hearing this same phrase as a young child when his mother described how she was redeemed and how she found refuge under the wings of the Almighty when she trusted the Lord and hid the spies in Jericho. She described to him how the Lord had saved her from a life of prostitution and brought her into the household of Salmon who took her and gave her a new life. When Ruth wandered into the field of Boaz she did not know that God had placed her in the ideal field. Why? This man had a heart for the stranger because in the eyes of this foreign girl he saw his own mother. He boldly went to redeem her and take her as his wife because he had the courage and the heart of his father who was willing to show kindness and grace to a stranger. What this teaches me is that God uses our circumstances to providentially lead us to redemption and to His finest future for our lives. Who can fathom the riches of his grace and the depths of his wisdom?
